Friday, September 9, 2011

More things I learned

• I think cyclists are all tattooed so the bruises get lost in the ink

• Once you've finished pureeing chilies, do not look into the blender

• Men may not make passes at girls who wear glasses, but contacts dry out in your eyes as you ride.

• If you've biked to the store, don't buy eggs.

• Don't hop in a jeep to go off-roading in a construction zone. a) It's not fun and b) it's a fucking construction zone.

• Approximately one third of Dallas cars are audibly in need of repair.

• There is nothing quite as sad as a grown man on a BMX bike

• Getting hurt being active is better than being a fatass on a couch, but getting hurt being active can quickly render you a fatass on the couch

• Take out your contacts before you chop onions, not after


  1. I feel the need to have a conversation with one of those guys that I see riding a BMX bike around the city streets: what the hell are you doing? If you're not riding it to/from the BMX location, and/or are not a kid riding your bike to school, then (insert pile of obvious yet pressing questions here)?

  2. Hahahahaha 1/3rd of the cars in Dallas are audibly in need of repair. I invite you to come visit Santo Domingo.